We all expect to feel sad after someone we love dies, but what if we don’t feel anything at all?
It may not be the way that society expects us to behave after the death of a loved one, but it is very common to feel disconnected and numb. Emotional numbness can be linked with a type of grief called ‘inhibited grief’ which is characterised by suppressed emotions.
It can be difficult to recognise emotional numbness in ourselves. Shutting out our emotions, whether consciously or subconsciously, is a way of protecting ourselves from the trauma of losing a loved one. It can allow us to focus on practical tasks, such as organising a funeral or taking care of friends and family.
Losing a loved one to a terminal illness can add to the trauma of bereavement as it isn’t just the death itself that we are dealing with, but also the experience of watching a loved one die.
Grief evolves over time and as this happens, the emotional numbness will subside. Everyone is different, so it’s hard to determine how long this will take. We must allow ourselves to grieve in our own way and in our own time and reach out for support when we need it.
Our bereavement service is a key part of the supportive care team here at Hospiscare. There are resources to help you on our website and you can also access support and resources from CRUSE, a national organisation for bereavement care.
